Thursday, March 21, 2013

Why Small Boobs Are Awesome


Among other endeavors in the pinup community, I am part of a panel that judges a monthly photo contest.  There are five of us, and our group goes by the name Tits On A Unicorn.  We run a page on Facebook that has two regular features, the Daily Unicorn and the Daily Bazoombas.  The Daily Bazoombas feature is open to any woman who wants to submit a photo, and the photos are, well, boob-emphatic.  The lady who handles the scheduling for the feature wanted a St. Patrick’s Day-themed photo, so I sent her this one to have on hand in case no others were submitted.


In the email, I told my dear uni-sister that if another photo were sent in that she would prefer to use, to please go ahead and use it, this was a just-in-case submission so we’d have the holiday covered.  I am well aware and will be the first to admit that I am not a boob pinup.  I can pad, push up, lean and bluff my way through boob shots when necessary, but they’re not my real strength.  I am a leg & butt pinup, and am perfectly fine with that, in fact rather proud of it.

This is what I do best

The photo was posted on the page, and received the following comment:

“Humm... are a bit small, but I like them”

A bit of a kerfuffle followed and was quickly smoothed over, when one of the ladies on the panel jumped to the defense of my girls and the original commenter stated that he hadn’t meant any offense, just that we usually post larger-breasted women in the feature.  Which is true, we do.  We post every photo that is submitted, and encourage women of all shapes and sizes who are of a mind to share their boobs for appreciation in our boob-friendly community.

But here’s the problem; it isn’t that smaller-breasted women don’t want to celebrate their boobs, it’s that most of them feel they don’t have a pair worth celebrating.  The majority of the submissions we receive for this feature are from large-breasted women because “bigger is better” is accepted as the standard by which boob worth is measured, and those women have been made aware from the time they developed them that their large breasts are great.  Comments like the one posted above, while not intended to be offensive, in truth intended as a compliment, are part of the problem.  It’s not that he pointed out the obvious, that I have small boobs.   It’s the inclusion of the word “but”, implying that liking small boobs is somehow exceptional.

It is not.  At least, it shouldn’t be.  Because small boobs are awesome, and here are just some of the reasons why:


1 – SMALL BOOBS ARE EASIER AND LESS EXPENSIVE TO CLOTHE

I hear large-breasted women complain constantly about the difficulties they have finding bras that fit and, when they do find them, they’re seldom the pretty lacy girly ones.  I wear a 36B.  I doubt there is a bra manufactured on this planet that isn’t available in my size.  I have never had a problem finding bras, and I’ve never had to deal with the price bump that seems to be integral to purchasing anything larger than a D cup.

And sports bras?  I am golden.  I can buy those in the children’s department.




2 – SMALL BOOBS ARE FAR LESS SUSCEPTIBLE TO THE EFFECTS OF GRAVITY

It is rumored that, over time, all boobs eventually find themselves doomed to show the effects of constant downward pull, and there is only so much that good muscle tone and underwires can fight.

Or is there?  These are my boobs, from the age of 19 to the age of 43.  I don’t know about you, but I don’t see any appreciable difference in the distance between them and my bellybutton over the course of almost 25 years.

Small Boobs: The Decades-Spanning Non-Sagging Saga

Maybe when I’m 50, that will change.  Or maybe it won’t.


3 – SMALL BOOBS ARE MORE COMFORTABLE IN HOT WEATHER

No matter how you arrange them, large boobs are going to have skin-on-skin contact somewhere, it’s just a matter of whether it’s between or beneath, and that means a higher likelihood of sweat and irritated skin.  Unless you put them in a serious lift & separate sling, which just creates a larger ratio of skin-to-fabric contact and doesn’t help matters much when you’re already dealing with being overheated.  We small-boobed women don’t have this problem nearly as much, and most of us have the option of going braless on particularly hot days.


4 – MEN ACTUALLY LOOK AT YOUR EYES AND LISTEN TO WHAT YOU’RE SAYING

Okay, not all the time, but the likelihood is greater that they might.


It’s really easy to find reasons to not like your body, to think you’re too heavy or too skinny or your boobs are too small or your ass is too big or your legs are too short or or or or or.  There will never be a day when you will have difficulty finding something to dislike about yourself if you want to try.  The good news is, with the same amount of effort, you can find something to like, and a damn good reason to like it.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go organize my collection of $9 sports bras.



6 comments:

  1. Since I've had the pleasure of knowing you for a while and the even greater pleasure of seeing you in person , I can absolutely, honestly say that your boobs are amazing.. And that ass is world class too!

    Looking back I admit that while big boobs caught my attention, the women I really loved didn't always have big boobs but they were still the most beautiful women I've ever seen. It's easy to have an ideal form when looking at the sexs but Diversey in itself is what makes the most incredible, beautiful forms you'll ever see. Imperfection and variety create more beauty than symmetry and a plastic surgeon ever could.

    And if the Girl isn't a huge bitch, that'll really help alot!

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  2. My Dear Ms. H. Carpenter,

    I regret to inform you that we men are still looking at your boobs while we're talking to you.

    Yours,
    M. Ursus

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Regret has no place when it comes to looking at boobs, Marius, but I do appreciate your candor.

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  3. I love this. I've never really felt my "pair" were worth celebrating because they're not big and round and socially acceptable. Funny story: yesterday, I was at a friend's house for a BBQ and I was wearing a shirt my friend had given me a long time ago. It reads, "Quick! What Color Are My Eyes?" The shirt comes from a company called Titty Tops, so I think it's safe to assume they are marketed toward the larger-chested population. I like the shirt cuz it fits well and it's comfy. Anyhoo, I was sitting across from a male friend in our mutual friend's backyard; he read my shirt and he said, "I'm supposed to be looking at your eyes?" I told him when I wear this shirt, it's ironic b/c I don't have big boobs. He said, "It doesn't matter. We're still gonna look at your boobs." Which proves two things:
    1. small boobs can be just as good as big 'uns
    2. men are pigs :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 1. I WANT THAT SHIRT! :D
      2. You should probably send us a boob pic to post on the page. Just sayin'.

      Delete
  4. A little late to this post, but I wanted to say some things because what you wrote really played some heartstrings of mine.

    I found this page because I literally googled "small breasted pinup". I've had small breasts my whole life (32B) and I would really like to feel confident with them. You really hit the mark when you said
    "...it isn’t that smaller-breasted women don’t want to celebrate their boobs, it’s that most of them feel they don’t have a pair worth celebrating"
    I have always felt like bigger was better, and it was really touching to see someone else describe exactly what I am feeling.

    Your list as to why small boobs are great is wonderful, but I don't think it hits on what women with small breasts really want to hear, which is that men find their breasts attractive as well.
    Or maybe I'm just projecting what I want to hear.

    In any case, thanks.

    ReplyDelete