I was 42 years old before I ever needed to buy any major appliances. For most of my adult life, I rented an apartment that had a fridge included and a laundry room on site, and prior to that I lived with my parents, where my input on the purchase of such things was limited to the occasional “I like the green one better”.
Then we bought a house. This particular house also had a fridge included (a really nice one, too; thank you, previous owners), but we did need a washer & dryer. And since our household setup is based on the somewhat old-fashioned model of him earning the money and me spending it, the task of selecting, purchasing, and arranging for delivery of said appliances settled on my full-time-homemaking shoulders.
Which was cool because, frankly, I love that kind of stuff. The thrill of the chase and what have you. The bigger the prey, the greater the satisfaction when it is brought down.
I began with a short list of requirements. For the washer; top-loading (I have a completely irrational paranoia of front-loading washers), high-efficiency (because I’m a tree-hugging “California-is-in-a-constant-state-of-drought”-raised hippie at heart), and able to fit in the space allotted to it and the dryer. For the dryer; the one that matched the washer.
I found a washer that met all of my requirements and was within the price range I had set for myself, and then began the next step in the selection process, the reading of reviews. For the most part, they were generically positive. Then I came to this one-star review:
“This washer doesn’t get clothes clean. They look clean, and they feel clean, and they smell clean, but they are not clean.”
A pause-worthy review if ever there was one because, based on the number of senses left to offend, I could only surmise that my clothes would either taste funny or start saying mean things about me behind my back if I subjected them to the processes of this machine.
Conclusion: Neither of those things, should they occur, would be the fault of the washer.
Still feeling the need for reassurance, I continued reading, until I came to this review:
“My husband likes this washer because the control panel looks and sounds like a video game.”